Monday, March 8, 2021

Blue Valentine (2010) -- REVIEW -- R | 1h 52min | Drama, Romance

 



















Blue Valentine (2010)

R | 1h 52min | DramaRomance 

Stars:  

 Ryan GoslingMichelle WilliamsJohn Doman 

This film reminded me of Marriage Story (2019) obviously made nearly decade after Blue Valentine.  Blue Valentine is an uncomfortable viewing, but if it helps you avoid pitfalls its worth it. The movie jumps back and forth between different points in a couple’s relationship showing the audience how things became the way they are.  Superior acting by both leads with Ryan possessing a James Dean-like vulnerability. They are both pin-up material if teens did that sort of thing anymore – its too easy to get whatever picture you want right on your PC now. Something gained, but something lost. 

The serenade scene was smashing.  We spend so much time searching for Prince Charming then marry the one with the good job in proximity if we marry at all anymore.

We go to the movies – many of us – to escape reality. Its good to get the focus

off ourselves.  This is why its better to give than to receive.  Comfortable as voyeurs (not a bad thing), we let the rich and famous distract us for a while until we have time to vacation ourselves.  I’ve never been to Disney World nor do I care if I ever go.  If I do it will be for the grand kids and to spend time with them.  What most of us fail to realize is our normal routines are wonderful gifts we should enjoy more than we do.  Think about it -- restaurants and coffee joints keep much of the populace going as we race here and there.  Its where people meet and fall in love doing normal things.  Nothing but sex is more intimate than eating and playing together.  Road trips and vacations are the distractions from normal life.  I find great comfort in my routines and seeing familiar faces and its nice to meet new faces here and there of course.  I think alcohol and smoking etc are fine in moderation, but sadly destroy far more than they heal in the long run.  Communication is very hard in any generation.  This film may be true of many folks, but it doesn’t have to be this way.  We are all selfish beings, but once married we now serve each other and can’t keep score of good and bad stuff that occurs.  Both must put the other first or its doomed from the start.   As the movie points out trouble finds us all.  Its how we handle it that makes all the difference.  If either person gives in to temptations to cheat or stop working on the relationship its already too late.  A good vibrant relationship takes time daily and doing stuff.  My wife and I enjoy walks, renting bikes, getting coffee and talking with strangers, overnights at BNBs, and watching our favorite TV shows together and taking in an occasional movie.   Love is a choice though and takes both parties to work.  As soon as either person gives up its over no matter what the other person does or doesn’t do.  Love must be more than a feeling or its worthless.  Love is a choice.  Feeling’s ebb and flow in everyone.  This is why we vow in good or bad times to stick it out and keep working at it in good faith.  People say if its right it should just come easylike.  That’s a lie.  Was this movie put together easylike?  No, it took years of preparation and money and hundreds of people in all kinds of expertise to put this movie together.  Anything worthwhile takes time and lots of effort.  Does each meal you eat prepare itself?  No.  Does fresh drinking water just appear in your faucet by magic?  No.  Everything good takes blood sweat and tears.  Prayer is powerful but even with prayer we need to give God time to work.  Remember keep serving God – not even God will override free will so when folks sin its not God’s fault.  Treat them like you’d like to be treated and keep on doing good and working hard.  Smile as often as you can even if you don’t feel like it.  Some will say that’s being unreal or fake.  Well sometimes we have to fake it until we do feel like it. 


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